The past has a sneaky way of sticking around longer than we'd like. If you experienced trauma as a child, it might be surprising to realise that those old wounds are still affecting you as an adult. Childhood is supposed to be a time of growth, exploration, and learning, surrounded by love and protection. But for many, it can also be a period of trauma and pain. Unresolved childhood trauma tends to linger and can resurface, sometimes subtly and other times quite intensely, impacting various aspects of adult life, including relationships and careers. That's why it's crucial to recognise the signs and address them. 

Arouba Kabir, mental health counsellor, wellness coach and founder, Enso Wellness, shared with HT Lifestyle some signs that would help you understand if you have unresolved childhood trauma.

1.⁠ ⁠Trust issues

Emotional neglect or any kind of betrayal can make it hard for a person to trust themselves and the people around them. It might make them sceptical of other people's intentions, which can lead to anxiety and fear of vulnerability in other relationships.

⁠2. Fear of abandonment

9 out of my 10 clients have shown this. Call the kind of comfort and soothing. A child should have gotten in their childhood was unfortunately absent in most children, which causes deep-rooted fear of being left behind and rejected. In your adult relationships, you might show avoidant or anxious attachment styles, which either make you distant or a clingy person in a relationship.

3. Struggles with boundaries

It just gets hard to identify where do I stop and you begin. when a child's No is not respected and they have been told No even when they shouldn't have, it affects their ability to set or respect boundaries as an adult. People pleasing behaviours or too much of stonewalling can happen.

⁠4. Emotional numbness or detachment

Shutdown as a coping mechanism is also very common, as we see in clients. If you often feel numb, detached, or unable to express your emotions fully, it may be a lingering effect of past trauma(PTSD). This can make it challenging to form deep, meaningful connections with others in the present. Substance abuse, violence and hypersexuality can be some signs as well.

5.⁠ ⁠Low self-esteem and self-worth

Any kind of trauma and abuse impacts our own self-image and silent shame and guilt are downloaded as a child, especially if they have gone through emotional, physical, and sexual abuse as a child. The constant feeling of fear of failure, self-criticism or unworthiness could be the outcome.

6.⁠ ⁠Persistent anxiety or depression

Constant anxiety, depression, or feelings of hopelessness in adulthood may be linked to childhood trauma.

7.⁠ ⁠Overreaction to stressful situations

If small conflicts or stressors trigger intense emotional reactions, this could indicate unresolved trauma because you are always in hyper-vigilant mode.

Identifying these signs can be the first step toward healing, allowing you to confront the suppressed trauma and reclaim Your emotional well-being.

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