When Ben Affleck revealed why he avoided speaking about his relationship with J.LO: ‘One of the harder lessons…’

When Ben Affleck revealed why he avoided speaking about his relationship with J.LO: ‘One of the harder lessons…’

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Ben Affleck once explained why he refrained from speaking too much about his rekindled relationship with Jennifer Lopez. Affleck described himself as a “not perfect man” and added that he wanted to “exercise a little restraint” and avoid “going into gossipy detail” about his and Lopez's life, or second shot at love. This was the Argo director’s attempt to avoid making the same mistakes he made when they first started dating.

“One of the harder lessons that I have learned is that it’s not wise to share everything with the world,” Affleck told The Wall Street Journal in December 2021.

“There are some things which are private and intimate and have meaning in terms of their intimacy by dint of the fact that they’re not shared with the rest of the world,” he added.

Lopez has now officially filed for divorce from Affleck after two years of marriage. She filed the papers in Los Angeles on Tuesday, August 20, which was the two-year anniversary of their second wedding ceremony that was held in Georgia. The actress listed the separation date as April 26, 2024.

‘I just don’t want to be talking about my personal relationship in the newspaper’

Affleck said in 2021, “I’m more comfortable just learning to find a boundary between things that I want to share and things that I don’t. I don’t know if it’s good or bad. I don’t.”

One boundary happened to be talking to the news media about his love life. “I know that I feel more comfortable having those healthy boundaries in my life around which, in a friendly and straightforward way, I tell you, I just don’t want to be talking about my personal relationship in the newspaper,” Affleck said.

“I’m going to exercise a little restraint,” he added.

Affleck, however, did open up at the time about Bennifer 2.0 being born. “I can say that it’s definitely beautiful to me,” he said. “And, you know, one of the things I really value across all facets of my life now is that it was handled in a way that reflected that.”

“My life now reflects not just the person that I want to be,” he explained, “but the person that I really feel like I am—which is not perfect, but somebody who tries very hard and cares very much about being honest and authentic and accountable.”

Affleck said at the time that “it’s hard to say who benefits more” from his restraint. “I could just say that I feel great about being very healthy,” he said. “And it is a good story. It’s a great story. And, you know, maybe one day I’ll tell it. I’ll write it all out.”

“And then I’ll light it on fire,” he added.

Opening up on how the two of them got a second chance at love, Affleck said, “I am very lucky in my life in that I have benefited from second chances, and I am aware that other people don’t even get first chances.”

“I’ve had second chances in my career,” he continued. “I’ve had second chances as a human being. Life is difficult, and we are always failing and hopefully learning from those failures.”

He added, “The one thing you really need to avail yourself of the opportunities provided from that growth is the second chance. I’ve definitely tried to take advantage of that.”

Previously, Affleck had spoken out about the end to their previous engagement back in 2003. “I think Jen and I made a mistake in that we fell in love, we were excited and maybe too accessible,” he said on the British TV series ‘Live’ in 2008. “I don’t think either of us anticipated the degree to which it would take on a world of its own.”

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