Happiness is an elusive emotion that falls short in determining the checklist. Everyone has their own definition of happiness. However subjective happiness may be, this emotion follows a few patterns. An intriguing study published in the journal ‘Motivation and Emotion’ explored the complexities of happiness and uncovered two fundamental pillars of happiness. Passion and self-regulation are important in defining happiness. This challenges our perception of a happy person, who’s always expected to be cheerful and optimistic even when they do things they dislike.

True passion

Happy people have a systematic approach to both the things they like and dislike. Happiness often arises from a fervent love or passion for something. Happy people engage passionately in activities that bring them joy and a sense of fulfillment, whether these are leisure activities, relationships, or work. Essentially, anything that brings you joy and a sense of satisfaction is worth pursuing.

However, it’s important to nurture passion mindfully. It needs to be balanced and flexible, integrating healthily and harmoniously with the other aspects of your life. The passion should not transition into obsession, overtaking your life entirely. This passion should be genuine, not something you engage to prove yourself. Happiness is not a race or a competition. If you go overboard, the warmth of passion can turn scorching and potentially burn you. When passion is pursued for external validation, the resulting happiness is often fleeting and can quickly become bitter. For long-term happiness, foster a harmonious passion that is genuine, and balanced, enhancing both your mood and overall wellbeing.

Self-regulation

Self-regulation is the inherent ability to direct one’s thoughts, actions, and behaviour for better results. This regulation must come from within, rather than being imposed by external forces. No one has a universal, one-size-fits-all emotion that applies to every aspect of their life. Even happy people have things they dislike and enjoy. Everyone wants to avoid unpleasant, less enjoyable activities, such as dull chores or difficult conversations. No one enjoys these tasks, not even the happiest individuals.

The difference lies in the approach. Happy people tackle less pleasant activities with personal choice and a sense of responsibility. They have more control and agency. It should not be because you are conscious of judgments. Mostly these uncomfortable tasks feel like an obligation, a response to the external expectations. In contrast, the sense of autonomy and free will happy people demonstrate when coping with less enjoyable activities makes all the difference.

Not everything is sunshine and butterflies for these happy people. The happiest individuals don't just have a passion for everything; instead, they focus their passion on activities they find enjoyable and handle less enjoyable tasks with a sense of personal choice and responsibility. Happiness is all about being responsibly selective. Genuine passion that is in sync and cohesive with the other aspects of life, and autonomy in self-regulation encourage a positive outlook that is not overwhelming.

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