Inflicting emotional, mental, or physical pain on someone within a relationship cannot be considered an expression of love. Nevertheless, individuals frequently possess an inherent inclination to become attached to those who cause them harm. Overcoming the pattern of being drawn to warning signs is a significant aspect of the healing process. Therefore, how can one discern the appropriate partner?

Relationship coach Bambie Blom has outlined several positive indicators to seek a suitable companion. Abuse is often misconstrued as romantic due to the attention it seemingly provides. It is essential to shift this viewpoint and focus on attracting healthier energies.

Signs of the right person

Bambie shared these signs of the right person:

• Your person would treat you well: They would bring alignment, clarity and peace- not chaos, uncertainty, neglect and rejection.
• Your person would stay: They would value you enough to try and make things work with you.
• Your person would want to be with you: You wouldn't have to chase after them.
• Your person would make you feel safe, seen and valued: You wouldn't have to convince, beg, or bargain with them to choose you.
• Your person would come to remind you how loveable and worthy you are: Not to challenge you to convince them of your worth; not to change into something they'd rather be with.
• Your person would have the capacity to show up for you: Their presence would be healing, not hurtful, but supportive; not wounding, but healthy. Not dysregulating.

Love, when shared with the right partner, resembles a leisurely walk together, hand in hand, rather than a competitive race where one feels perpetually behind or as though their partner is advancing too quickly. The indicators that Bambie proposed illustrate that the appropriate individual will appreciate you and uphold the principle of mutual respect.

Love is not a battlefield

Bambie conveyed a significant message that should resonate with all: love is meant to be a sanctuary, not a conflict zone. She emphasized that the right partner will provide comfort, show genuine care, and consistently choose to be with you, regardless of circumstances.

Many individuals mistakenly approach love as if it were a competitive endeavour, striving to demonstrate their value in order to maintain it. However, Bambie clarified that true love is fundamentally challenging to relinquish.

A relationship ought to serve as a source of healing rather than a burden that depletes your spirit.

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