When we encounter someone we are attracted to, our initial reaction is often to integrate them into our lives, dedicating our time, energy, and affection to them. However, during this process, we frequently overlook asking essential questions or discovering significant characteristics of our partner, which can lead to conflicts later in the relationship.

On January 10, Kimberly Moffit, a Relationship and Psychology Expert (PhD), posted on Instagram, highlighting some 'underrated conversations' that should take place with your partner prior to making a commitment. In her caption, she emphasized, “Trust me, you want to have them early.”

8 things to ask before committing

According to Kimberly, there are crucial inquiries that can help you gain a deeper understanding of the person you are interested in. In her post titled ‘8 topics to discuss before committing,’ she outlined subjects that include trust, dealbreakers, and boredom, among others.

Here are the eight topics she recommended:

1. How do you handle boredom?

It is vital to understand how your potential partner manages boredom. Kimberly stated, “Do you require constant stimulation, or are you comfortable with quiet downtime? This insight reveals how each of you navigates comfort zones and whether you might grow bored with one another or desire personal space.”

2. How does ‘home’ feel like to you?

The relationship expert advised inquiring about your partner's definition of ‘home.’ She elaborated, “Is home a physical location, an emotional state, or a person? Do you yearn for travel and adventure, or are you more inclined to stay in and create a cozy nest?” This will provide insight into your perspectives on living arrangements and whether your views are compatible.

3. How do you recharge?

“Some individuals thrive on social interaction to feel revitalized, while others prefer solitude. Understanding how each of you recharges will help prevent energy depletion and feelings of neglect,” Kimberly clarified.

4. What's your deal with trust?

The relationship expert recommended discussing with your partner their views on trust, including how they cultivate it and what actions might undermine it. “Share past experiences, as well as your thoughts on vulnerability and dependability within a relationship,” Kimberly advised.

5. How do you feel about failure?

The expert encouraged asking your partner how they respond to setbacks, whether in life or relationships. “Do you bounce back quickly, or do you find it difficult to move on?” This inquiry can reveal much about their resilience and emotional maturity.

6. How do you deal with the unexpected?

“Do you feel anxious, adapt easily, or attempt to control every aspect? Discuss how each of you responds to unforeseen challenges, such as travel issues, sudden changes, or unexpected obstacles,” she suggested.

7. What's your biggest dealbreaker (Beyond the obvious)?

According to the expert, while we are all aware of major dealbreakers like infidelity and dishonesty, it is important to identify smaller issues that could lead to a breakup. This might include a particular habit, lifestyle choice, or personality trait.

8. How do you feel about routines?

Are you someone who prefers structure, or do you thrive in a more chaotic environment? Do you require a set routine, or do you enjoy spontaneity? Gaining insight into this aspect can help mitigate conflicts regarding lifestyle preferences and future plans.

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